


Wide Hips and Stuff

by Gamerright



Series: Fruitful-verse [4]
Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Bad Touch Trio | Bad Friend Trio, Crackish/ nonesense, Gen, Joke about friends, Mild flirting?, Random - Freeform, implied crushes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-20
Updated: 2019-12-20
Packaged: 2021-02-27 00:47:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 776
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21868552
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gamerright/pseuds/Gamerright
Summary: Francine and Antonio point out Marie's petite stature. Marie doesn't like that, especially when the Vargas siblings get involved.
Series: Fruitful-verse [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1869925
Kudos: 14





	Wide Hips and Stuff

Marie happily sipped some juice while she watched her friends chat at the lunch table. They were out in the courtyard lounging about until next period began.

“Yesterday, while I was at the mall, I saw this beautiful blue dress~!”

“You always see dresses at the mall, Fran,” Antonio said. He twirled his necklace around in a circle that was strangely mesmerizing to watch. 

“Of course,” Francine clasped her hands together, stars practically shining in her eyes. “Dresses are the most wonderful things in the world! They’re so stylish and practically go with everything!”

“Not everything,” Marie cut in. “You wouldn’t wear a dress to a street fight, would you?”

“Only you would say something like that.” Antonio shook his head.

“You never know.” Francine looked Marie up and down. “A dress with flare would go great for the occasion, but…”

“What?” Marie asked. She didn’t like her friend’s tone.

“It would be tough to find a dress that fits you. You’re on the... small side.” 

The comment stung more than Marie would have liked. In middle school, Marie had been the tallest, but over the years, the tide slowly turned until she had to crane her neck to even look her friends in the face. And then Francine had to grow in other respects that made her self conscious.

Marie blamed vegetables. Antonio’s mother was known for feeding her children lots of vegetables, so that must be the reason he was so tall. As for Francine… she blamed the heels. And Mother-goddamned- Nature.

“I am _not_ small!”

Antonio’s eyes quickly scanned Marie. “Mhhhmm… yeah. You are definitely petite.”

“I am not!” Marie shouted.

“Well, Fran does have a bigger waist and chest than you.”

“So? Don’t compare me to her when she’s practically 6 feet tall!”

“Marie.” Francine laid a hand on her friend’s shoulder in what was supposed to be a soothing manner. Marie wasn’t soothed at all. “It’s okay to be slim.”

“What are you three talking about?”

Strutting towards them was the person Marie wanted to see least right now. Out of all the girls she knew, Chiara was well rounded, in all the right places.

“Marie’s upset that she doesn’t have much ‘thickness.’” Francine replied.

“I am not! You're the one who brought it up.” 

Chiara smirked. That’s not good. “You do have a slim waist and you don’t fill out much anywhere else. Are you a B cup?”

“C!”

“I bought you a couple of B’s the last time I went shopping and you said they fit fine.” Francine said. Her face was split open into a wide grin.

“Shut up, Fran!” Both of her friends were traitors. It was decided, she needed new people to hang out with, preferably ones who didn’t criticize her.

“What’s going on?” Feli trotted up behind them.

“Feli! Please tell them I’m not the smallest one!” Marie cried, grabbing his sleeve.

“Smallest?” Feli tilted his head.

“Don’t bring him into this!” Chiara shouted.

“Do you mean chest size? I could check for you.” Feli gave a suave smile.

“Sly, but no.” 

Marie listlessly dragged herself to the nearest bench and collapsed into its seat. 

She wasn’t that small. 5’2 was common amongst girls her age. It was because she was so short that the rest of her didn’t fill out. She didn’t always eat her vegetables when her _Vati_ told her to. Yeah! That was why…

“Aaaghhh!” Marie screamed, pulling at her hair. She let her head fall down with a _thump_ onto the table.

“It’s okay, Marie.” Feli sat next to her and patted her back. “Even though you’re small, you’ll still be able to find a husband. And I bet your children will be just as pretty as you!”

“Yeah!” Marie exclaimed. She pointed at her friends. “At least my children will be beautiful!” She paused for a moment, then her head flopped down into her hands as she gave a cry of despair. “I can’t say that when I’ve had a crush on half of you!”

“Me too?” Feli pointed at himself.

Marie peeked at him through her fingers. 

“No. You’re cute, but you’re the normal kind of cute. Sweet and bubbly, but you’re missing something. Something… deadly. You’re more like a little brother to me.”

“But you had a crush on my sister, right?”

“Yeah.”

“Then,” Feli’s lips twitched as he held in a small laugh. “Aren’t you saying she’s tough, like a man?”

“What was that?” Chiara practically growled.

Marie’s hands flew up to her mouth as she laughed. “Well she is big and strong with her _wide hips_ and _enormous chest_.”

“Fuck you, bitch!”

“Love you too, Cey~”

**Author's Note:**

> Cey- In case some are confused, when I read Chiara I pronounce it Chee-Are-ee-ah, but that is apparently wrong. Key-ARE-ah according to hetalia kitawiki hence Cey(Key).
> 
> Also, this was basically a crackish story that I wrote a while back. Might as well post it, right?


End file.
